Interview with Michael J. Fox

It's been 20 years since Family Ties went off the air.

Gwennie's showing

Look at Gwen Stafani..how cute. Love the dress, if that's maternmity wear, count me in. Uhhh, just the dress, though, not a pregnancy. I doubt Demi is jealous either, her kids are nearly raised, she's hot and skinny and her hubby just turned 30. I think she's happy where she is.

Billy Joel's wife is so intelligent

Katie Lee Joel says she and hubby Billy Joel are thinking about expanding their family. Katie: “I’m always thinking about cute names. I always say that babies are the new Birkin. They’re the hottest accessory right now. Everybody has to have one.”

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I don't know when she'd have time to take care of a baby, what with being a rocket scientist and all.

Posh does Fashion Week

VB's been laying low lately since she announced she wasn't really a singer, but, a fashion person. Didn't that come as a shock? Cough. Here she is in Donna Karen, I love orange, but, didn't Crissie wear that on Three's Company? And I dig the shoes, but, you know they cost 1000's and really, wouldn't a kids jump rope threaded through a bottle cap be pretty much the same? Yawn.

Ivana Trump at the beach

Yep, she's old and has more money than God and most everyone looks shitty at the beach...except her new boy friend, Rossano Rubicondi. Dang!

Paris drunk on her ass in Boston last Thursday

Tardo ParAss decided to "sing" at The Estate in Boston, though it's doubtful anyone asked her to. She was so drunk she gave a boobage show instead when her top fell down. You'd think she was trying to cover up in that last one, but, she was really just copping a feel and going "Ummmmmmm boobies."

Does Tyra poo herself?

Fabian Basabe (Paper Mags Fashion Week reporter dude) ..."I arranged to do it backstage at the tents in the w suite. Just when I start getting comfortable and ready, a group of madmen and madwomen storm in and take possession of the suite because... ready?... Tyra Banks messed herself and needed to change. Now, let's break this down: messing oneself should not happen if you are older that 5 or younger than 90. if it happens and in fact you are older than 5 or younger that 90, then it should be one, single, very unfortunate episode which will bound you to be made fun of forever and you can't complain about it. Now I would like to bring to your attention that Tyra's people carried a change of clothes for her at NYC fashion week. Hmmmh... could it be that Tyra messed herself before? or just that her entourage is so organized that in case tyra would ever, maybe, possibly mess herself that one time, they have a change of clothes? I don't know..."
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He's saying Tyra shits herself and probably does it on a regular basis. True or sour grapes, either way it's fun to see Tyra pissed off.

Britney's parents have their hands full

I was just kidding when I told Lynne Spears that Jamie Lynn was having a kegger, but, I wasn't far off. After hearing that her younger daughter was partying and drinking while she was away, Lynne left LA and flew back home to Louisiana on Thursday. According to 16 year old Jamie Lynns friends, she thinks it's okay to drink and smoke while you're pregnant because her big sister did it and her kids are fine. This whole family is "special."

Miracle baby of Tennessee

Jessica Alba...laugh of the day

"I'm so excited for my baby to be brown. I just have to believe that the dark gene is going to survive." Pregnant Jessica Alba hopes her baby has her fiance Cash Warren's African-American genes.

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How many times can I type shut the fuck up in one week?

Amy will be doing the Grammys via satellite

Yeah, Amy Winehouse finally got her US Visa but, according to a bunch of bla bla about "logistics" from her reps, she won't be here. She will still do her thing via satellite. But, get this..as soon as she completes rehab, she’s moving in with Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne and their daughter, Kelly, in the guesthouse of their estate outside London. That's right! Amy will have a functional family now!

Cher on Good Morning America 2/7/08

Cher's back! And she dated Tom Cruise. Ewwww.

Frances Bean Cobain does Bazaar

Frances has some things to say, and seems to have her head on straight. About the interest in her that stems from who her parents are.. "I get it, I really do," she says, "but at the same time it's creepy." "These people are fascinated by me, but I haven't done anything," she says. "If you're a big Nirvana fan, a big Hole fan, then I understand why you would want to get to know me, but I'm not my parents." "People need to wait until I've done something valid with my life."

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She's interested in photography and/or journalism (there may be a summer internship at Rolling Stone). And though she gets along with her mom, she says her paternal grandmother, who lives in Washington was "the most constant thing I've ever had."

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As for her mom, Courtney Love (refering to the theatrical backgrounds in the mag shoot) says :. "Frances grew up on musicals. I think musicals comfort her," Love, 43, tells the magazine. "She's a gay man trapped in a woman's body, like me."

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Shut up, Courtney, that's a stupid thing to say about your daughter.

New e-mail from Dawna Lee

Hi‏
From:
Dawna Heising Sent:
Thu 2/07/08 9:05 PM
To:
flying_buttress@hotmail.com
Okay, you win. I don't want enemies in this world. I'd rather have friends and it is a really BAD picture!

Dawna

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You know what, Dawna? You're a sport. I'm an asshole. It WAS a really bad photo and we all have those. You're much better looking than me and that's why you were Ms. World. You need a better photoshopper for real though. I'll do it for free anytime.

Melissa Joan Hart and Bai Ling

Some women have been known to have sex or walk up and down stairs to induce labor..but, I guess standing next to Bai Ling might work. It would scare the kid out.

Kelly Osbourne thinks the net is full of pervs

You won't be meeting Kelly on the net because she thinks we're all pervs. She said:
"I'd never go on one of those online dating sites. It's weird.It's full of sexual predators. The internet was created for knowledge and now it's perverted."

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Ehh, get over it, Kelly, real life is full of pervs too. The difference is...in real life they hide it better. On the net, you can spot a perv in the first 5 min of conversation. "Cyber?" "What R U wearing?" Doh. Click.

Winehouse WILL perform at Grammys

Amy was denied a US Visa, but, she will be performing at the Grammy's via satellite. Good enough for me! Yay!

Jesse Metcalfe gets punched..hard

Owch!

Ashlee Simpson on Jimmy Kimmel Live 2-6-08

She's annoying. Her laugh makes me cringe.

Lipstick Jungle

Did anyone watch Lipstick Jungle last night? I liked it. Three women with huge important careers and ridiculous amounts of money who still have fucked up lives. I admit, when they had scenes of them "working" and they were all being at the head of their games (talking loud over people with a phone in each ear), I spaced out and went "oh, lookie, pretty scarf!" But, that's just because I've never been important enough to need to carry two handbags at once. It's about as real as the Easter Bunny, but, who cares? It was entertaining.

Oksana Baiul at Fashion Week

I'm curious..what do YOU think when you look at that?

Angie in Iraq

Eating with soldiers and having her photo taken and refusing to answer pregnancy questions (those are irrelevant, don't ya know?) She seemed confused about the food, or maybe she doesn't recognize food. I dunno. She has a plan and a purpose..I just don't know what it is. That soldier is cute though. (waves at the cute soldier.)

Kate Walsh..this weeks hero

Because she used her own money to open a dog adoption center in New York City yesterday, called the Pedigree Dogstore. Walsh says, "It breaks my heart to know that there are so many loving dogs in shelters just waiting to find homes. "It's impossible to articulate the happiness that my adopted dog Lucy brings to my life - so I'm excited to be a part of a program that is committed to raising awareness and funding for these wonderful animals."
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I think it's awesome that she did this and I agree with her..if you want a dog, adopt one that needs a home. You can check out the Pedigree page HERE.

The Lauren Conrad collection launch

Good grief, does everyone and their dog have a "collection" now? I must be getting old and grouchy (grouchier?) because all I can think when I look at that is..someone put me in a nursing home when I can't figure out where to find a white shell and a black skirt. Or when I call that inovative. Lauren Conrad...another frickin' genius.

Jessica Alba is cracking me up

Jessica told Latina Magazine that she only wants her child to speak Spanish, at least for the first three years. The problem is..Jessica doesn't speak Spanish herself. That's okay, I doubt the kid will want to talk to her anyhow. She gets this weeks genius award.

Angie's not in Africa, she's in Iraq

She talks to CNN HERE, all I hear is bla bla bla. Sorry, but, she talks a lot and says nothing really. Save the world, Angie, save the world!!!! "Uhhh, displaced, country, uhhhh, so, so, broad implications, uhhh, easy choice, so, uhhhh, goal to to to reach, so, uhhh."

Daddy's movin' in!!!

I wasn't even going to bother with Brit's parents statement, but, then I found out they sent it to Anderson Cooper at CNN and that cracked me up. Doesn't CNN have a few other minor things they should be covering?

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The Spear's: "As parents of an adult child in the throws (sic) of a mental health crisis, we were extremely disappointed this morning to learn that over the recommendation of her treating psychiatrist, our daughter Britney was released from the hospital that could best care for her and keep her safe. We are deeply concerned about our daughter's safety and vulnerability and we believe her life is presently at risk. There are conservatorship orders in place created to protect our daughter that are being blatantly disregarded. We ask only that the court's orders be enforced so that a tragedy may be averted."

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So, Daddy's moving in with his daughter. This should be hilllllllll-arious. At least he won't drug her like that bastard Lufti. She's gonna be mighty pissed off though and I wonder how fast Daddy Spears can drive? My bet is the last thing he sees today are her tail lights fading over the Hollywood hills.

Salma Hayek at Raising Malawi charity event

I can hardly believe she gave birth to Valentina only 5 months ago. She was bigger than J-LO and big all over. Now look at her. Love the dress, the hair, all of it. I don't think she's ever looked better. Gorgeous.

Holy crap!

Someone prop J-Lo up from the back..please! She's still wearing high heels, I'd be demanding a wheel chair. Is it Valentines yet???

Stars out for UNICEF

I could have titled this photo Scientology vs Kabalah vs angry lesbian, OR Katie Holmes is a giant, covers her shoulders with napkins, but, really, I'm just glad Tommy Girl found someone he's taller than.. Lourdes! Glad mom finally did something about that unibrow, sweetie. Now run!

This is pretty damn funny

Paris Hilton singing live at some karaoke thing. She's so tone deaf yet thinks she's hot. It cracked me up.

Nasty beauty queen

Katie Rees the former Miss Nevada who was stripped of her crown for being a naughty ho, was arrested Wednesday morning. The beauty (cough) queen was driving on a suspended drivers license, had suspended license plates and was cited for speeding. She also assaulted an officer. I like her pic, shows you how fake beauty contests are. Well, Katie, it's time to go to rehab then it's into porn work for you. I don't want you frying my burgers.

Well, I'm over him now

Why, John Mayer? Why? You can now do all the sweet pouty vids you want...I will never get this picture out of my head. Uggg.

Woman of the year

Hollywood socialite Paris Hilton has been named Harvard Lampoon's Hastiest Pudding of the Lampoon Award. More like panty pudding of the year. Herp included free. I wanna see her wearing that as a hat. By the way..that longer bit of hair is an extension she pins on the side of her empty head. She said so on Letterman.

Gwyeneth's yuky dress

Okay, it's not hidious, I wouldn't even mind the giant bow if the dress was longer. Okay, that was a lie..it's sucks. It's too short and the shoes don't match and they ARE hidious. I think I saw them in the Dollar Store sale bin. And pastel pink formal wear should only be worn at high school proms. I mean it, I like pink too, you probably look awesome in a pink sweater or blouse, but a formal? Nope, on grown ups you just get that Baby Jane look. Sorry. I don't see how showing up somewhere looking like a dork will help Malawi orphans, but, whatever.

Chanel makes bikes???

Jen Aniston had a craving to take up bike riding so her buddy Courtney Cox bought her a 12 thousand dollar Chanel bike. Jen loves it, it has eight speeds, weighs 36lbs and comes complete with a quilted leather seat and saddlebag emblazoned with the famous Chanel ‘CC’ logo. Now, that's a good friend. Who knew Chanel made stuff like that??

Note: There's the 12 grand bike. Gawd.

Rehab is the latest fashion

Kirsten Dunst is in Cirque Lodge with Eva Mendes ( I barely know who Eva is, so don't care.) They both have substance abuse problems. Whatever, I still think Dunst needs shampoo and a dentist. Also in the psych ward is Delta Burke who wants help with a hoarding problem. I'd like to see her house. I mean really, she manages to get her rich self hot and skinny again and checks into the nut house for hoarding caused by depression? (looks around..hmm.)

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I understand substance abuse and hoarding..been there, done that, SOOOO over it. Can anyone tell me how to catch Touretts? Yeah, yeah, it's bad, I'm terrible, bla bla..but, wouldn't it be fun to call people cocksucker and cunt hole right to their face and say, sorry, I have T, T, T, Touretts, asswipe fuck lick? I also pretend to have agoraphobia so people will leave me the fuck alone. I'm going to make that a post card for Post Secret as soon as I get out of procrastination rehab.

Poontangs free!

Welp, I made it to work, the lil' red slip and slide scooted right past the stuck cars on streets that are now barely one lane from the snow piles. I even picked up two unknown passengers after their 4 wheel drive got snowbound. Yeah, I know, you shouldn't do that, but, they looked normal to me, just cold, and it IS a long walk to town from here. Anyhow, I digress..I got home to hear the news that Britney is not a danger to herself and was released. So, she still thinks she's British and is fighting her parents. Adnan came and got her, later she told paps he could shove his new number up his ass (shouldn't that have been arse?)... Maybe only Southern Britney likes him? She's still crazy, what's next?

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Note: I included her latest crotch shot in case anyone's having withdrawals from not seeing her trainwreck poon for a whole week. Yowza!

J-Lo twins..not a rumor

Jen Lopez really is having twins like we all thought. Her dad spilled the beans. We think it's a boy and a girl since she had braceletts made with the names Emme and Max put on them..the braceletts are a tradition for newborns in her family. We'll know for sure on Valentines day, that's when her C-section is scheduled. I'm kind of excited, can you tell?

Katherine Heigl's car gets robbed

Katherine Heigl's car was broken into last night, her husband Josh Kelley used a pair of socks to clean off the broken glass and the couple took off. Josh said "Thieves suck." But, they only took the GPS system and missed the two uber expensive guitars Josh had in there. The only thing worse than a thief, is a retarded thief.

Dannielynn at her moms grave

Larry Birkhead sold out his kid to ET. He took her to visit her moms grave on the anniversary of her moms death and sold the vids to ET. He didn't think ET would run parts of the film, but, they did. I saw Dannielynn pitching a royal hissy and bawling her eyes out because she had no clue where she was or what she was doing there. She just wanted her baba or something. Then Larry managed to calm her down and kept whispering things to her until she looked confused and muttered "mama."

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Shame on you Larry..I used to like you, now I think you're not much better than Vergie, who emails celeb sites and offers to fly to the Bahamas to pose at Anna's grave for money. It's sickening.

Heath's dad speaks

Kim Ledger: “We remain humble as parents and a family, among millions of people worldwide who may have suffered the tragic loss of a child. Few can understand the hollow, wrenching and enduring agony parents silently suffer when a child predeceases them. Today’s results put an end to speculation, but our son’s beautiful spirit and enduring memory will forever remain in our hearts.
While no medications were taken in excess, we learned today the combination of doctor-prescribed drugs proved lethal for our boy. Heath’s accidental death serves as a caution to the hidden dangers of combining prescription medication, even at low dosage.”

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It's was a sad ending for a good guy. I'm going to leave it at that unless there is real evidence of irresponsible doctors and lawsuits and such.

Liar!

No, you won't be dead soon, you big fat liar. Not here anyway. At least that photo shows dead grass. Not here. It's snowing up a storm again today. It's always snowing. No, I take that back, we did have the ice storm and two days of rain that froze into more ice. I can't stand it, I haven't seen pavement in almost 4 months. You can't walk in the yard because it's nothing but huge chunks of ice piled on more ice. Will I get to work today? Hmmmm, I have a new (almost) car I call lil' red slip and slide. I also have movies to return and you know how cheap I am. I hate late fees.

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Oh, the movies were "Waitress", which had Kerri Russell and was good, "The Nanny Diaries", with Scarlett Johansson, a fair time waster, and a horror flick called "Joshua", a demented evil child flick. Liked it.

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I hate this place. I'm inclined to believe Iowa's property title is held by Beelzebub. I hope the bastard owns a snowplow and a salt factory. Speaking of snowplows, where are they?? The number of cars abandoned in the street drifts outside now reaches four. Wimps! If I run out of cigarettes I will plow you out of the way myself in the lil red slip and slide.

Heath Ledger...cause of death

The New York City Medical Examiner has ruled that Heath Ledger died accidentally, “as the result of acute intoxication by the combined effects of oxycodone, hydrocodone, diazepam, temazepam, alprazolam, and doxylamine.”

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Heath's body was flown back to his hometown of Perth, Australia where he will be laid to rest.

The restraining order against Sam Lufti

This is a copy of the actual restraining order taken out against Sam Lufti by Lynne Spears. It is....horrific and shocking. HERE.

Amy might make it after all

I'm so happy to post this photo of Winehouse looking good. She was let out of rehab to visit hubby Blake yesterday, then went back in.

Jessica Alba claims she was attacked by a ghost

Alba has a new movie out..The Eye..a horror story, but, she claims when she was 17 she was attacked by a real ghost.

*Alba, 26, recalled: "I had no idea what it was. I felt this pressure and I couldn't get up, I couldn't scream, I couldn't talk, I couldn't do anything.
"Something definitely took the covers off me and I definitely couldn't get off the bed, and then, once I did, I screamed, ran to my parents' room and I don't think I spent many nights in that house ever again!
"There was definitely something in my parents' old house - I don't know what it was. I can't really explain it. But they got it blessed and they burned sage and stuff since then."*

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Note: This is know as old hag syndrome, sometimes ISP for "isolated sleep paralysis. Sometimes there's just no rational explanation for it and it's happened to a lot of people. Their stories are quite interesting and frightening. Maybe the ghost just wanted an autograph.

Meth info

Several people on here had questions about meth (crank). Personally, I used to think the war on drugs was stupid..let people do whatever they want as long as they don't fark with me, was my motto. That was before I realized meth heads put everyone around them in danger. Gone are the days when a fairly clean drug resembling cocaine was manufactured in remote areas by real chemists. Now every fucktard junkie can cook it right next door to you and your family. So many innocent children have died or been maimed for life in meth fires.

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If you want some easy to read facts about meth...click HERE. They aren't some unknown person in some ghetto far away..they are now your neighbors, no matter where you live. Finding out how to spot them is protecting your family.

Amy's going to the Grammys

Amy Winehouse briefly left rehab to her a visa so she can come to the US and attend the Grammys..with a minder and then straight back to rehab, they promise. She doesn't look as awful as usual..the beloved beehive is back, bigger than ever, she's thin, but, not stick thin and she's wearing real shoes these days. Cool beans.

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Oh, and her fingernails are clean and polished and no burns on her fingers.