True to her Scroogie form, my mother gave me a used necklace for Christmas. It came in a wrinkled used zip lock. I kid you not. The zip lock seal was torn and she'd used tape to hold it. She used the end part of the tape, that part that has green on it. She wasn't going to waste scotch tape on me. When I looked at the baggie, I could tell the necklace was badly tarnished and the metal was flaking. It had those black spots fake jewelry gets when it's ready to be thrown away. It also had some rubbery beads on it, that were covered in a gummy substance. It was filthy. I chuckled, because I knew it would make a good blog post. I opened the baggie and took the thing out and ran my fingers over the chain......a piece of rusted metal flaked off and wedged itself under my thumb. I ran for the sink and it wouldn't stop bleeding, I suppose because I'm so anemic right now..I'm on meds for that. I was finally able to yank the metal flake out with tweezers and a magnifying glass and bandage it up. When I went to throw the piece of shit away, I noticed a tag on a string. It said "50cents dd".......dd is not for DirtyDisher, it's for whoever sold it at a yard sale. There was quite a lot of blood, but, not much pain, I don't have much feeling in my fingers. I used some of the blood in a spell later. No, it wasn't a curse, shame on you. LMAO! I knew I should have thrown her present away without looking at it. Remind me of this post next year. Okay?*
So, what all did you get?? Tell the best and worst. I love that.
Well... Dan did good this year. He got me a Wii. I got him a Pea Coat (if thats how its spelled).
ReplyDeletePat;
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry your Mom's evil present bit you.
Remember the fable about the boy and the snake? "You knew I was a snake when you picked me up!"
I just cringe when you talk about being around her now. Please take it easy, ok?
very kind words and generosity from a new friend....
ReplyDeletethe neighborhood kids gave me hugs when i gave them their gifts...
i also got a gift card to lady godiva for $26.66! my friend eddie always gets me that!!
that necklace!!!! glad you're okay, damn!!
oh and it's not a christmas gift per se, but a friend is getting me a wii & wii fit plus for me to do exercises for my neck & back spasms since my insurance won't pay for physical therapy, my dr. said to get a wii instead.....
ReplyDeletei feel i am truly blessed!
A pretty pink and silver watch with lots of crystals in and on it from my Hubbie. Some more Faeries and a book and cd to learn Cajun French.I hate it when people talk shit and you cant understand them. Then I got a freaking Jesus clock!
ReplyDeleteI saw Avatar 3D. Wow...just...wow. James Cameron teleports you to another world and dares you to not believe it's real. Maybe because it was the 3D effect but I felt like I was there.
ReplyDeleteYa gotta like a movie director/writer who makes a movie you pay too much money to see and leave feeling like it was a gift.
That first picture is scary, are you sure you're ok? Dang bad presents. I got one like that from the MIL with the price sticker on it still. I threw it away when we moved to WA. She is such a be-yotch!!
ReplyDeleteSo my best present so far has been peace of mind and good friends this year. A friend and her hubby took me to see Sherlock Holmes and out to lunch yesterday and my "friend" and his girls came to visit yesterday. They were dressed up all cute and opened their presents. I got them a game for their Wii and they wanted to bust it out and play right then, lol! If it wouldn't have been so close to their bedtime, we would have been cheerleading all evening.
I have decided to let all bad presents go the way of Christmas past :-) Love and peace to all here!
Alyssa, who gave a Pagan a Jesus clock???? How lewd.
ReplyDeleteimo, a Jesus clock would be lewd for anyone! Alyssa, they could have at least given you the clock with the matching velvet Jesus portrait. It's a SET, ya know.
ReplyDeleteLOL Cut, so true.
ReplyDelete...one of those paintings where Jesus' eye follow you. LOLOLOL.
ReplyDeleteI agree, the picture with the blood was disturbing. Scary to believe all that came from a sliver of metal but I had to laugh when you said the gift would make a good blog post. That's the way to make lemonade out of lemons. lol
ReplyDeleteIf your meds are making you that anemic I hope you're taking great care while doing everyday things. I'd hate to see what would happen if you cut a finger while slicing oranges or something.
The best was two drawings that my daughter did for me. I am proud that she has this talent too. The worst, having to take a relative to the clinic on Christmas Eve because they came to my house high on drugs and asking for more. I was not putting up with that in my house. To the doctor or I call the police. I also love my DVD sets of a couple of my favorite British Sitcoms.
ReplyDeleteBrig, scan them in and I'll post them. I love childrens art. It's so honest.
ReplyDeleteFrim, the meds are supposed to help the anemia. I take more meds now than an AIDS patient, it's creepy.
ReplyDelete"the painting where Jesus eyes follow you".....Thanks Dish for reminding me of one of my childhood nightmares....that thing freaked me right out...But his eyes looked open and closed....it was scary.
ReplyDeletesnowbunnie
Oh, we had one too when I was little. I always thought Jesus was spying on me. It pissed me off.
ReplyDeleteWOULD LOVE TO SEE LESSY'S DAUGHTERS DRAWINGS. SO THEKIN COME TO YOUR HOUSE CONFAN FOR THE GOOD DRUGS US USE FOR UR FIBROMYALIGIA??? FIGURES YOU WERE HIGH ON NARCS.
ReplyDelete****************
Curious,
You type a paragraph like the one above and then accuse someone else of being high on drugs???
the troll got a new supply of meth i see for christmas....
ReplyDeleteTrolls sink to the lowest in human behavior and then blame you for it Pat?
ReplyDeleteMaking incoherent threats with frequent mis-spellings are your choice and our amusement, troll.
I got four new books, a necklace and a new iron, but my best present was the looks on my kid's faces when they opened their presents :)
ReplyDeleteeeeww! sink picture dramatic. Damn dumb gifts. I didn't get any this year unless you count candy I don't like. That's no one's fault. Just don't like fruit with my chocolate.
ReplyDeleteThe troll has a very bad reading comprehension problem.
ReplyDeleteI hope you have your tetanus booster up to date DD. LOL
ReplyDeleteI got a new lens for my camera. Adobe Lightroom 2, and a beautiful necklace from Riss that has 2 circles and says Mother Daughter, Best Friends on it. I got a bunch of pictures that Ralphie made me in my stocking. The worst thing I got from Jim was the ugliest brown/gray sweater you have ever seen LOL I cannot lie because my feelings are written all over my face so he knew I hated it LOL It will be a nice warm sweater to wear around the house though:)
Troll had to leave. Their cockroaches needed fed.
ReplyDeleteOh the best gift I have to share. Marcus our seven year old. I asked him his favorite part of the day was? "I like that Santa Trimmed the tree".
ReplyDeleteI loved that, we purchased a tree about a week ago and put lights on it and a few homemade decorations and couldn't find others packed away.
So we just incorporated the tree decorating into Santa's visit. I love that he loved it because I love having a tree with just lights for a week. I wasn't really feeling like mother of the year for having a untrimmed tree.
Guess it adds to the morning WOW factor.
Maybe it was the old style tinsel love that messy stuff.
He was sweet and sharing all day. It's Christmas mom I want to share. It was so sweet I was teary, It also caused no games to be won or lost and they would go on FOREVER.
"no mom here are more cards it's Christmas"
Pat, I hope you are ok. Lots of Neosporon (spelling?) on that to keep it from getting infected.
ReplyDeleteMy best gift I would have to say was either the fur blanket my partner sent me from Afghanistan or the rose gold key necklace ,y mother gave me. They are both beautiful. The worst gift I got were 2 of those space vac closet organizers. I really needed them, but that is not a gift...
More to do today. Made glass etching for my family I am visiting today. You can see an example on my blog.
My best gift was I-25 being clear fear for travel so I could get to Colorado Springs. My 10 y/o grandson was standing at the front door with his gift for me in his hand. He was so proud and excited to give to me on the spot. He bought all his gifts this year with his own money and mom taught him how to wrap. It was a box of multi colored, striped bow tie pasta from World Market.I can never cook that pasta. I need to find a pretty jar to display it in next to the Fiestaware in my hutch. Eric called it Fiestaware pasta. LOL and a tear to an old grandma's eye.
ReplyDeleteescrow
oh, and the trip home wasn't so great. Blowing snow, bitter cold and black ice.
Dang DD thats F-up. Glad you didn't put that crappy thing on your neck. The packaging almost looked like a drug deal.
ReplyDeleteWhy dont people just come out and say hey.. im broke I cant get you anything this year. But maybe we can make something crafty or bake. Instead of giving someone garbage, crap , and useless shit.
Noelle, what a great tradition to start! I love trees with no ornaments too. Aww.
ReplyDeleteAva's Mommy, she's NOT broke. She's cheap. She ruined ever birthday and nearly every Christmas for me and my brother when we were little with her cheap cheap cheapness. And she's still trying to do it. We both DESPISE teddy bears because of her..can't even look at them without rage.
ReplyDeleteescrow, that is so dang cute, and the pasta really will look pretty in a jar. Awwwww.
ReplyDeleteSole' thats some nice work! I used to teach a glass etching class at the prison..they etched a lot of pot leaves..lol. Pretty though.
ReplyDeletelove your story Pat -- sorry I think her heart was in the right place -- yeah there is always 1 in the crowd ehe? lol.
ReplyDeleteI was sorry to read about the cut though - glad you were able to get it under control.
Well my hubby got me a Wii Fitness and he was shocked I didn't ask him WHY did he think I needed to exercise lol -- thought I would be nice to him 1 day of the year :).
People will probably boo me here - but we gave some people(family & friends) donations in their name to the food bank.
Isn't that what it is all about - bringing smiles and happiness and what better way then to help a less fortunate person then myself.
My sister also asked her class (teaches gr 7) instead of buying her gifts, which they always do, to collect and give to the food bank -- they collected $350 and did that - she was so proud of them.
So perhaps a different kind of gift but I think a great gift to give.
Crystal/Judy
I am so glad I can tell someone about the sweetest gift I got this year...well, ever.
ReplyDeleteLong story short--I found one of my best guy friends from college. I haven't seen him in over 12 years. I was moved to locate him at Thanksgiving and he was thrilled to hear from me.
We have both been married and divorced. I lost my pregnancy in 2006, and he had twin girls in 2004. We live in different states and have been emailing and talking like crazy. It's amazing to rediscover the sweet boy I knew who is now a successful businessman and the most devoted daddy. Am I weird that I think him being a wonderful daddy is really really appealing??? It just shows what a selfless, warm person he is.
I found my old friend and am so intrigued by the man he's turned into!
On to the present he sent me...He was always the shy guy you could count on and had a wicked sense of humor when he was comfortable with you.
So Will and I both seem to be developing crushes on each other.
He sent me an email on Xmas, it was written in his voice, expressing his thoughts and wishes to "The Wish Man." It was a lovely story about seeing me again and realizing how crazy he was about me and hoped our futures would follow the same path. He used song titles in the story and then sent me every song, over 40, from iTunes. It's like the most romantic take on the old mix tape. But that he wrote me a story about us and how he thinks and feels about me, with songs for me to listen to that express so much more. One of my favorites was this example, and I am paraphrasing," 'Don't Give Up' (peter gabriel song) because she's the one."
The whole letter incorporates these beautiful song titles in to the story he tells.
He told me on the phone that he always had a thing for me in college! he said, "Oh my god, you were , of course I was crazy about you! You were hot and funny, those are hard to find!" And I always wondered why the boys always treated me like one of the guys...I was so naive.
I am thrilled to find him again now, we weren't ready for each other before.
I have had a very challenging few years and wondered if I would survive...finding Will feels like finding a piece of myself that was missing. He's given me back the perspective of the great girl I was back then and is charmed with who I am now too.
I don't know what will happen, but we are going to get together early next year and see how it goes. I am not trying to look too far ahead, but I am so proud of the PapaBear he is with his girls. It hasn't escaped me that finding this wonderful friend again is an extra blessing of goodness because I could share the joy in watching two precious girls grow up, something I will not have on my own (not be their mom, they have one, but an appropriate and thoughtful, mature adult in their lives). I love it when he tells me about the notes the girls left for Santa. They sound so creative and confident. He's at the movies seeing the Princess and the Frog right now.
I am still smiling he put so much thought and effort into it--it was such a huge leap of faith to send me that lovely letter.
Sprite
Her heart was not in the right place Crystal, that's why Christmas upsets me. She goes out of her way to get the cheapest things possible.
ReplyDeleteI'm happy for you Sprite..good luck.
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of donations to the food bank. So much better than crap you can't even use and don't want.
ReplyDeleteWow that's beautiful, Sprite.
ReplyDeletePat,
ReplyDeleteMaybe your Mother has always known that you were inherently bad. Some people are born that way.
I am also grateful I have a place to share things I can't tell anyone else. I love this community.
ReplyDeleteI have several friends in the military abroad. I donated in their honor to Wounded Warriors Project and have signed up to be a volunteer. I also adopt a soldier every year for a deployment abroad--someone I don't know--he asked for gummi bears and "Ranger panties" for him and his guys. (They wear them like underwear, easy to clean..) They were thrilled to get a bunch of sizes for all and I am proud to cover their ranger backsides!
Sprite
My mother who has never had a good word to say to me or about me sent me a plate that said something like this (I smashed it and threw the pieces away): To my daughter who is the light of my life, your beauty and grace have always amazed me. You take my breath away". With it was a little clear plastic piece of crap stand.
ReplyDeleteShe gave her other children money, as she always does, saying to me that they need the money and so she knew I'd understand.
What a hypocritical piece of junk it was. Either she saw it at a thrift store of some kind or on one of CVS' 50 cent shelves. The plate and the box were dirty as anything.
I usually get a kick out of the crazy old lady stories, that one- not so much!
ReplyDeleteI finally got the KitchenAid mixer I've been waiting 25 years for, yeah! Made my waffle batter yesterday morning and my mashed potatoes last night. It works like a dream. Brought the egg whites to a soft peak in seconds.
I'm in love!!
wtf is up with the troll today?? this is ridiculous!
ReplyDeletegood for you BH, i would smashed that plate too! if you are able, cut her out of your life...and if you can't, have as few of encounters with her as possible....
know that YOU are valued and don't let her get you down!!!
I usually won't buy myself anything because I always feel like I could do something for the kids, the house or whatever else. The only two days that are mommy shopping days are the day after xmas and the day after my birthday. My girls and I had a lovely mall day together, had lunch and my little one got a manicure. I loved it and so did they. They were thanking me for taking them even though I'm the one who was so grateful they went.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Ms. Tia. When I graduated from law school years ago my mother attended the ceremony, but soon afterward came over to me, grasped me by the upper arm and whispered in my ear "You are no better than you should be". WTF?
ReplyDeleteMy own son has never understood what her problem is with me and because I didn't want him to feel any Grama rejection, we've lived as far away from her as we could.
Mom has her two little sweeties to take care of her when she's old and feeble ---- or does she?
a couple years ago my mom gave me a mixer and a cutting board...but they were used. she said it was ok cause she washed the mixer and it had been in the garage so it was hers, and the cutting board had a bunch of marks on it and it was a piece of wood that had come on a microwave cabnit as an attached board. i havnt gotten anything since, but they spend thousands to give all the neighborhood unemployed gifts for christmas
ReplyDeleteDamn DD your mom doesn't disappoint, does she!
ReplyDeleteHubs and I got ourselves a new lcd TV-DVD combo for the bedroom and a set of speakers with sub woofer to go with it. We went to look at it last saturday and when I came back from Seattle sunday night he had already installed it. So that was our early present cause he couldn't wait to open it till christmas lol.
Yesterday was the first time I hosted Christmas at my house in about 5 years or so.
ReplyDeleteThere were over 20 people here not just family but also friends who are like family.
We had a wonderful meal and everyone had a great time. No fussing or fighting. The little ones were running around so happy and full of sugar.
It was the best present I could ask for.
I hope everyone had a wonderful day.
I honestly don't know what my best gift was. Materially, I guess it was the IPhone. I wasn't expecting it, and had really decided to just stay with my current phone until late spring, or so. The old phone still works, so why change?
ReplyDeleteI loved it that my son saved and did all his Christmas shopping on his own, and chose well. He actually gave me a "Build-a-Bear" certificate to buy clothes for my stuffed dog.
I also loved seeing my ex-sister-in-law again. It has been a long time, and when I've seen her on aol, I wasn't really sure I should invade her space by IMing. Now I know she really was touched that I miss her and want to stay in contact.
The other good thing, was that I was able to talk to my MIL, and essentially tell her to simmer down. I stayed very calm, and chose my words carefully, but I let her know she is "borrowing trouble", to use an old phrase, by handling my FIL's illness the way she has. There is no reason on earth that she has to attempt to hurt and humiliate everyone around her because she can't control what is happening. She seemed to hear me, and calm down a little. I hope it lasts.
There is too much blood on and in the sink at your place, Pat. I hope they know what they are doing with you, medically. Be sure and watch that little laceration. Have you had a TDAP (tetanus booster) within the last two years? If patients have not had the booster within the past two years, we will give it prior to discharge from the hospital. It's something you might think about, as you are about to have a new baby in the family. The incidence of whooping cough (pertussis--the P part of the injection) has increased over the last few years---the danger is mostly of caregivers infecting the baby unknowingly. There have been infant deaths. Right now I am more interested in you having the tetanus part, but however you want to look at it. . . in preparation for more gifts from your mom, etc. . . it is a good idea.
I hope things work out with "Will", Sprite, and I'm sorry you had the Christmas Eve you did, Brigadoon. Though I have to say "hats off to you!" for handling it the way you did.
Good thing you don't get paid for posting your mom's antics. You know she would be screamin' about a royalty check.
ReplyDeleteTHE PARASITE KNOWN AS CURIOUS-
ReplyDeleteYou're a classic example of someone that's fucked up & beyond any kind of help. You're a bitch with way too much free time. I pray that the gene that makes you the motherfucker you are,skips a generation so you're kids are not doomed to be like you for the rest of their lives. The last thing we need to do is to make more of you using your kids.
Jen aka cock roach-
ReplyDeleteThanks for your useless assessment cock roach now scurry a long.
DD, that was horrible. You've asked her time and again to not buy you anything. I've been on the receiving end of sadists like this who use Christmas presents to further a grudge and it infuriates me. I could do a whole blog post on this subject. Damn them.
ReplyDeleteThe neighbor bought the Jesus clock for me. I guess it's for me to see what time hes coming to save my damned soul! WTF ever! LOL...
ReplyDeleteI guess it didn't occur to me when writing earlier, but an excellent present is that my FIL is still here.
ReplyDeleteThe other present I got today is a first seafoam green (Yes, green!!!) egg from one of my little easter egger hens. I have been waiting for this, wondering if she would lay a brown or colored egg. Yay, green!!!!