That's how he serves Katie her warm decaf barley water every morning, that way he never has to touch anything a vagina might have come near. The Lil' General has a new article in Esquire, it's called "How To Be A Man." Seriously. I can't even make up shit that good. I don't have time for the 37 million jokes this article opens. Be my guest.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Tommy Girl's a swinger
That's how he serves Katie her warm decaf barley water every morning, that way he never has to touch anything a vagina might have come near. The Lil' General has a new article in Esquire, it's called "How To Be A Man." Seriously. I can't even make up shit that good. I don't have time for the 37 million jokes this article opens. Be my guest.
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24 comments:
i like how his pinky is sticking out while holding the teacup! :)
Don't have a joke. Just wanted to let you know he didn't get it DD. :(
-Biz
This is photoshopped. Look at how the rope never goes between his legs or his feet. It just sorta swings behind him. He wouldn't be able to hold on to it like that without it crossing his body somewhere. Unless you're an acrobat, and Tommy is not, it's impossible. Photoshopped!
With THOSE hips...he's gonna tell guys how to be a man? I don't think so!!!
rox
He looks like he's going thru menopause, his middle is wide now. Yea, it does look shopped. Now that you mention it. It doesn't matter. He's still a girl. Not a guy. Nope. And thats how he likes it!
rox
you can so see where his foot was standing on a box for this photo.....
What I got from the article is that he thinks everyone in his household and throughout his life are there for his benefit.
Jarhead
so sorry, biz.
How can Tom be a man? Strap it on!
Biz, I'm sorry the job didn't work out. Hang in there.
Give it up Tom. Nobody thinks you are a manly heterosexual man. Including your wife.
He has a very feminine physique in this pic. His outfit looks like something out of the eddie bauer for women catalog. I like the machine faded thigh area on the jeans--shows off his curvy figure. You GO Girl!
thanks Casper & Anon... we're pretty bummed
Tom has thunder thighs. Worse than mine.
I guess there's a bright side to everything right?
-Biz
LMAO!!! Tom Cruise telling guys how to be a man?! OMG that's hilarious, he's such a little girl. Wow, 14 pictures of him, nauseating. He can try & try & pose for as many pretty pictures as he wants, he's not cool & he's not manly, IMO.
ROFLMAO! Thank you everybody. Here in the Northeast it is 92 deg F. We do not have one AC in any windows. So it has been a hellacious day. Thanks for the laughs!
Especially you Rox!
quote from esquire: "I'd do Donald Duck as John Wayne"
Credit John Byner for that. Cruise would have seen him doing that on Byner's comedy show Bizarre when Cruise lived in Canada as a kid.
john byner!!! FUNNY GUY!
Sorry Biz. :(
Hey Biz...I'm so sorry. Please take care of yourself. I wish there was something I could do!
Since we are talking about things that make your skin crawl, does anyone else get the heeby-jeebies when the Burger King commercials come on? That "King Thing" is really perverted looking! I wish they would find another way to advertise. It's like creepy clowns.
Bayou ~
The King creeps me out. BK must have a big ad campaign going on because it seems like every time I change the channel ... there he is.
Thought mascots were supposed to appeal to little kids. That thing would scare the crap outa a kid.
BK runs print ads in Europe (not sure which parts of Europe) featuring horror movie icons. There's an ad with Jason eating a BK burger in his car while a tied up and presumably dead cheerleader hangs over the hood. There's another one of Freddy Krueger picking up a drink at the drive-thru and poking holes in it with his knife-fingers. I am not sure why BK thinks using movie serial killers is a good way to advertise fast food, but at any rate, those ads are still less creepy than their commercials with "The King".
Miss Tia, All 'real' men stick their pinkies out while serving warm decaffeinated barley water! It's de rigueur!
My favorite King is the "Realty king" from American Beauty!. Tommy would love to get the royal treatment from that guy.
Jarhead
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