Weird death post..I'm not sure why

There's a helpful photo of a graveyard, in case you don't know what death looks like. Eye roll at my own self for having no better idea of what pic to post with this weirdo post. Death. I am close to death. By that I mean, I talk to dead people and because of that, maybe I think of death differently than other people. Or maybe not. Some people have that thing called faith. I do not. I believe only in things I have personal proof of and I do not, in any way, think I have a calling to change anyone's mind or make them some sort of believer in something. Don't care. Not my business. I know what I know.

Death is the end of life as we know it. To dispute that is idiotic. Death steals life. The thought or belief that some form of life goes on after death does absolutely nothing for the true grieving of those left behind. Oh, it might be some comfort later, but, in the now, it sucks. It sucks so bad, you can not describe it to those who have not grieved yet. Their time is coming. Morbid, isn't it? So, why this post? Because yahoo news had this video posted about some humorous mommy blogger who got some major attention and I watched it because I do that. I'm a You Tube freak, because it's easy to get, easy to skip ahead, etc. I follow about a dozen people on You Tube who are self made wanna-be stars because I get bored and these people appeal to me for whatever reason. Some of them I've mentioned on here. Some I have not. What ever. I get a kick out of everyone from old Mormon ladies with ADHD to zitty teens with grave fetishes to that crazy 'tard' family. Hey, it's five minutes of my time, so what?

So, when I saw the amusing mommy blog vid, I went to her channel on YT to see if she was someone I'd follow. I found her too slick for my taste. She's photogenic and clever and her babies are cute, but, she's a film wizard and just..too slick. Too cleaned up for me, too..professional. HERE is the vid I originally found. She's actually awesome at making videos and will probably become rich from it. I wish her well, she deserves it, but, it's just not for me. That said, she led me to Connie. Who the hell is Connie? Another young mommy blogger (there are 72 million mommy bloggers, right?) who is in the same group as Elle, the film maker. So, I'm watching a few of Connie's vids and she's real cute too and gives mommy advice and pregnancy advice without being too slick or annoying. HERE she is talking about her C-section and child birth trouble. She just seems joyous at being a mom. But, then I notice all these RIP comments and I'm like WTF?

So, Connie died giving birth to her second child, a girl. She died. She flat out fucking died. In this day and age of medical miracles, this young woman died having a baby. She left behind a grieving husband, a little boy who doesn't know why his mommy is not ever coming back and a newborn baby girl. And it left me wondering if all these young mommy bloggers have any idea that birth is not just cute gender announcements, funny song parodies and skits about poop? I wonder if any of them realize they could die because birth is still a huge and dangerous undertaking? I wonder what you say when something like that happens? You say, THIS, I guess. Someone makes a nice video of you and then, you're...gone.

My son has a memorial vid too. Sometimes I like it, sometimes, I hate it. Mostly I ignore it and just keep it marked so I know where it is. I don't even know why I posted this. I just don't think death is attractive in young people. It pisses me off. Last night I was up late watching TV that I usually can't watch because I have a kid here. But, last night she was at her maternal grandpa's house (thanks, gramps) so I got to watch Louie CK. And of course, one of the episodes was about senseless death. WTF? Why don't I just stick to the sci-fi channel? He ran into a friend on the bus and bam, she dies. He goes with her to the hospital and her last words are, 'Am  I dying?? I'm not ready for this. Louie? Bye?' And that was it. Bye. Bye? Are you kidding me? Louie CK was stunned. No words. He was just like, WTF? Then he walked out and life went on.

There is no point to death when it happens to young people. It's unfair and it sucks, that's all. I want so badly to say that to these kids who are obsessed with death. The kids on You Tube I run into a lot while searching for someone I get. But, I try to never comment on You Tube. I am strictly a lurker. When one of the hoards of mommy bloggers die, who is to notice? I do and it made me sick. That's what I wanted to say. That's all. I am tired of death. I can't wait for the kid to come home. She's very alive and makes this house alive. I want to encourage her Goth phase, but, make her understand that death is not attractive. There's a line. We'll figure it out somehow. Even with her family history. I need to go watch something more cheerful. Who do you follow on You Tube, anyone?