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Rather than snark at the way Lindsay is carrying that condensed version of the bible around for everyone to see, I would rather ask myself what promises I would want from a God if I was Lindsay Lohan. I'd make him promise I could have a dad who wasn't crazy and wrote letters about me to the media while he was in prison. I'd demand a mom who didn't use drugs, made her own living and didn't embarass me by claiming to be a bigger star then me and an Ann-Margaret look alike. I'd then realize I wasn't getting either one of those things ever, and I'd burn that book while chugging straight vodka and flashing my hairless poon. But, I'd charge for it. Lindsay should never flash for free.
5 comments:
She thinks Jesus will turn her water into wine and her Voss into Vodka. I think that is what Lindsey wants God to promise her.
BBABH
LOL! Could be. I feel so sorry for her after reading her whore moms stuff. I can't even call her Blohan this week.
If you believe hard enough, Jesus will turn your water INTO JOINTS. I know; there's a picture of it over on Crabbie's. The religious community should know about this. Lindsey knew what she was doing the whole time. God I thought my Mom sucked...
BBABH
Friggin' Crabbie scooped me on that one. It's hilarious too..I'd better steal it.
I know it sounds like a cliche, but Jesus has changed my life. I'm no longer a drug addict, I now have a beautiful family. And because of what He has done for me, I have to stand by His side and speak up when people mock Him. He's not some dead prophet. He is God and He is alive...waiting and preparing a place for you in heaven. Won't you look into it? Please?
If you all took the time to look into the life of Jesus and got to know Him, you wouldn't be mocking Him. Well...maybe you would, I don't know.
BUT - Jesus died for YOU so you could go to heaven. But if you don't want to investigate His promises, or get to know Him, then sadly we won't see you in heaven. And I really want to!!
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