Chick interrupted

My blogging and Egg Day was interrupted briefly by my brother who thought someone was shooting at him and called the police on himself. If that makes sense to you, go take your meds. My mother was worried, asking "Why does he hear gun shots?" And I said, because this is Easter Sunday in Guntown. What did you expect, ham? Doh.

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So, my brother said he needs to be somewhere he feels is a safe environment. That's lingo he picked up from his social worker. So I ran him out to the mental health institute, known to locals as the Nut Hut. He had his paper bag of meds packed, his only luggage, but, certainly not his only baggage, and he was sitting in a lawn chair, clutching it, hyperventilating. He wanted me to drop him off on the grounds of the Hut O Nut. I said no and we rang in and an attendant called his shrink.

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Geez. His new doctor showed up and I swear to you, he looked like a young male model. Long blonde hair blowing in the breeze. Like Smith in Sex And The City. I was thinking..if this is what looney gets you, count me in. Hot hunk doctor tells Bob that he's sorry it took so long, but, it IS Easter Sunday.

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Bobby says that explains a lot. His mother is God and he's Jesus. At this point, I can't help but ask where I fit in? Bob says I am the opposite. "Like...Satan, Bob??" I'm starting to get worried. No, he explains..like bad ass, not afraid of anything. I like that. That's not so crazy. Then he tells the doctor he can prove his mother is God and reached in his jacket pocket. The nice male attendant and Doctor Hot Pants duck and I step closer. Curious. I know he's not that dangerous. I'm his sister. Dangerous?? Pffff, please! They should have to drive mom and the aunts to the Dollar Store. I'll give them dangerous. Back to the story.. He whips out a big wooden cross. Big. It must be 18 inches high. He tells them how he bought it at a yard sale. For protection. Must have been Mom's never ending sale because he never leaves his room. I left then. I told him I'd call him tomorrow and see if he needs cigarette's or underwear. And I will. I always do.

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When I got home, Lissa was in the yard and she says "Uncle Bobby sick again?" Yep. "Is our whole family's crazy?" Yeah, pretty much, except you and me, kid. We're alright. She agrees, shrugs, goes back to re-hiding plastic eggs. I have to remember to tell Bob that our mother is NOT God. She just thinks she runs the world.