The truth behind the sweet cat behaviors you think are so cute can be found HERE in an article titled "6 Adorable Cat Behaviors With Shockingly Evil Explanations." You think he rubs against your leg because he loves you? Nope. He owns your ass. Cats who don't cover their poop or who poop in front of your door are telling you that YOU are a piece of shit peon and HE is the boss. I met one like that last year. My footprint is still in his furry ass. Kittens are adorable, I'll admit it, but, they grow up to be asshole cats. Before you type to me about what a bitch I am, let me tell you something I don't talk about much. I have a cat. Her name is Fucking Avery. She used to be just Avery, but, now it's always me waiting on her hand and foot and going "FUCKING Avery." Her favorite trick is to walk on the roof and cry. When I go out to let her in, she jumps on my head. This is no longer amusing to me, but, Fucking Avery never tires of it. She has me well trained in stupid human tricks. Because she's an asshole cat. That's the most redundant sentence I've ever typed.
Monday, December 7, 2009
Attention, all you deluded cat owners
The truth behind the sweet cat behaviors you think are so cute can be found HERE in an article titled "6 Adorable Cat Behaviors With Shockingly Evil Explanations." You think he rubs against your leg because he loves you? Nope. He owns your ass. Cats who don't cover their poop or who poop in front of your door are telling you that YOU are a piece of shit peon and HE is the boss. I met one like that last year. My footprint is still in his furry ass. Kittens are adorable, I'll admit it, but, they grow up to be asshole cats. Before you type to me about what a bitch I am, let me tell you something I don't talk about much. I have a cat. Her name is Fucking Avery. She used to be just Avery, but, now it's always me waiting on her hand and foot and going "FUCKING Avery." Her favorite trick is to walk on the roof and cry. When I go out to let her in, she jumps on my head. This is no longer amusing to me, but, Fucking Avery never tires of it. She has me well trained in stupid human tricks. Because she's an asshole cat. That's the most redundant sentence I've ever typed.
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37 comments:
My cat's name is "Dam it Pickles" . I think they figure out the owners pet peeves pretty quick and act accordingly. My cat's worst trick is tripping me while I walk and/or lying directly across my path - and refusing to budge. Since i have arthritis, walk with a cane , and am pretty shaky sometimes...well, "Dam it Pickles" !!
Dirty little shit sucking troll, you think you're going to insult a child on here?? I think not.
Dam It Pickles is a fine cat name.
Troll I read your vile comments....
Someone in your past has obviously abused you and filled you with hate and anger. Take you issues up with them.
You are mentally ill- and I feel sorry for anyone who has to share a life with you. Get some help. You need it. I hope you get deleted ASAP.
Yep Troll-you got deleted!!! Ha Ha!!
And that aint all. Fucking chicken shit brain dead assholes.
I'm a deluded cat owner who has given into my cat's every whim. If the cat is comfy on my side of the bed, I try to do anything to not disturb him when I try to get under the covers. Our cat sleeps between my hub's legs, and hubs will get cramped just to not disturb the cat. We have to be very careful, we don't want a pissed pussy in the house.
Pissed pussy...naughty. Heh.
My youngest cat, Booger, has decided that he likes to play my piano at 2am.
I still love him.
I wasn't here in time for the troll's comment, and that is probably for the best if he's messing with someone's kid.
What a world we live in.
I have had my share of cats...Stubby was the bestest he was born with no tail, Blacky was a close second I told you all about Blacky my sons cat...Then there was Miss Kitty the cat from hell she would leap at you from no where and tear you up bitch ho cat is what she was, I have never wanted to drop kick a cat in my life until I ran into the likes of her. Then there was a cat we called stranger because one day it walked into my house and decided to stay, and the last cat was a short fat cat we called garfield don't know where it came from it just came in and stayed until it decided to go...I will stick with the puppies/dogs.
Connie
Cut, they're messin' with my Lissa and when I find out for sure who they are..I will publish their photo, name, address, job, phone number and everything I can find. And they will cry like a baby, just like that last meth whore that pulled this shit.
DD;
I am so sorry.
What kind of a freak says shit about little kids? You don't have to answer that.
If there's anything I can do, let me know.
Does he work for a newspaper?
I hope you find out and publish it all! It is so sickening to bring a child into this.
Brig,
Don't you get it? This is about YOU!!!
Don't you get it. I don't give a shit!!
I woke up a couple of weeks ago and there were feathers all over my bedroom. You piece of shit Patrick had brought me home a present.
It is disgusting to clean up bird guts and feathers first thing on a Sunday morning.
He usually just leaves them at the front door but this time he felt the need to massacre the poor bird in my bedroom.
He usually tries to sleep on top of my head at night and when it's time to get up I get the claws in and out on my head. He has to have his breakfast at 5am everyday.
Pat, that scab knows just where to hit you. Is he so stupid that he doesn't know you hit back? He really is a piece of slime messing with a kid. A very stupid piece of slime!!! Is he the Asshole in the picture? It's a good likeness!! A ruptured ass with shit for brains! You don't mess with OUR Lissa!!!!
Oh yea, you do. It is bothering you to no end. I know it and you know it. You are the target and you know why.
Oh anony you really need to go back on your meds and get some stronger ones while you're at it. I have no fricking idea what the hell you are talking about. You have really lost it!
one time I read that ceaser said cats are dicks. Something like that. Its true, you dont own a cat a cat owns you.
I have 3 myself victor von doom daisy may and lily ann monster diablo. Victor and Daisy are brothers and sisters they are ok. They do try to trip me. Specially when i was pg. I told them stop play try to kill goliath. Than we got Lily she is a street cat. She is like that movie marley and me. Just in cat form. She is evil to the T. I wanted to give her up and trade her in for a heminway cat. But since we moved we couldnt take another cat. Some day..
When I first read monster diablo I thought it said Monster Dildo..LMAO..I was thinking, damn that's harsh.
Brig, I know what they're doing. Don't you go anywhere. You belong on DD and I aint afraid to scuffle with scum.
LOL DD.. She has been called a dildo at times LOL... hahahaha
Thanks Pat!
Hey pond scum pick on someone your own size.
LEAVE LIL LISSA ALONE !!!!!!!! Kiki
I really do love cats, but I love dogs, equally, and I love my chickens, too.
It's been almost two years since we had a cat in this house, and the last few years with the elderly kitties were not pretty. My husband doesn't want any more, but I'm almost ready to take in a little waif or two. Preferably two. We had very loving kitties and I miss them.
Christina
I love my cats and they know it. As far as I'm concerned I'm wrapped around both of their little paws. I'm their bitch. LOL!
You ARE thier bitch..lol. I am Fucking Avery's bitch. No doubt. LOL at Cut's cat playing piano in the middle of the night.
Read Catwatching by Desmond Morris. It's a much better look into cat behaviour than that link.
I, for one, welcome my new feline overlords.
Thats Kendra! LOL!!!
Is it?? Anyhow, thanks Ronnie.
I thought it was Kendra too but the boobs are too small
escrow
lol, so im not the only one. we have 4, 2 were found behind a garbage can in the mail room of a trailer park we lived in several years ago. they were 3 weeks old. i wanted to get them homes immediately cause i knew i would get attatched but alas, they are still here. my husband calls them the dummies. i have never seen cats like them. luke used to climb the curtains constantly, they get on everything & knock stuff over breaking it. they open the bathroom door on you, the other night they tried getting on the fridge & pulled everything down on the floor. i bought feathers for a project & they got them all over the house. you cant do any sewing or anything with string if they are around cause they will attack it. if they want fed they will act like they are hearding you towards the bowl. i used to love cats but now i am a dog person & i cant wait til they are all gone
I know. Cats take over and they don't really like you. Why do we do it?
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