I got my front flower bed almost done. It's a bigger space than it looks in these pics and it took me a long time. I'm slow now and it had gone to weed this spring. Tedious to hoe around all the real plants. In the back I planted things I knew would withstand a cold snap, Cleome, Four O Clocks and Zinnia's. In the front I raked and scattered a ton of Marigold seeds I'd saved. I have to buy some Rosemary, this is my herb garden. But, now it's pretty much done. *
Today is my Mother's birthday. She's 80. And I didn't buy her a gift or a plant..or even a lousy card for the first time ever. I deliberately ignored it, even though she sent Lisa over here with several hints. Maybe I'll regret that someday, but, I doubt it. I have too many regrets about things that can't be changed and most of them involve her. I'm sick of pretense and guilt and acting the way I'm expected to towards her when in reality, I have frequent dreams of punching her face. I'm not proud of it, I probably desperately need some therapy, but, that's the way it is.
Why should you buy a sappy card for someone you hate? Bitch can figure it out and cry to her asshole sisters. They're all nothing but a bunch of mean, whining, conniving, lying, back stabbing, retarded, hillbilly ASSHOLES.
Today is my Mother's birthday. She's 80. And I didn't buy her a gift or a plant..or even a lousy card for the first time ever. I deliberately ignored it, even though she sent Lisa over here with several hints. Maybe I'll regret that someday, but, I doubt it. I have too many regrets about things that can't be changed and most of them involve her. I'm sick of pretense and guilt and acting the way I'm expected to towards her when in reality, I have frequent dreams of punching her face. I'm not proud of it, I probably desperately need some therapy, but, that's the way it is.
Why should you buy a sappy card for someone you hate? Bitch can figure it out and cry to her asshole sisters. They're all nothing but a bunch of mean, whining, conniving, lying, back stabbing, retarded, hillbilly ASSHOLES.
26 comments:
don't ever regret not getting her a card or anything!! just because someone gave birth to you doesn't mean you owe them anything!
have no guilt at all!!! you owe her NOTHING.....
enjoy your garden!!!!
Thanks.
Dito miss tia, could not have said it better.
Don't dwell on it DD. Life is like that it just is.
We both have mean tricky moms and you are
not her keeper. Miss Tia is right. You don't owe
her a thing. Enjoy your garden and have
beautiful :) day with Lissa. Enjoy life ! Kiki :)
I have the same dilemma with Mother's Day coming up. I've been playing her way for a long time, but since so much has been revealed to me about what she's been doing behind my back, I have to start respecting my own needs and wishes. I wish I never had to speak to or think about her ever again. But my kids like her and she pays for their education.
She always has us on some kind of hook it seems.
Well there's no clear answer, but whatever you do she'll find fault with it.
Miss Tia's right. You owe her nothing.
Oh...and yay garden!!! So happy to see you're starting up.
I love that you are back in the gardens. The fairies are probably very excited for your return.
Don't worry about the card thing. Most 80 year old ppl dont have anybody to send them cards anyway! My mother died just before Thanksgiving in 2008. I was notified, I did nothing. She has had nothing to do with me for over 40 years, except when she was trying to sue me or something. I was told she had died several years and anyway, so I thot she had already died. It's strange, but I have never felt sadness about it. Maybe I was sad 40 years ago when I relaized I had no mom, so that was ended a long time ago? Don't feel bad girl. Enjoy your garden. And I wouldnt get a card for the person that destroyed my yard either!!! No way! We love your gardens. I am excited to see them grow. I need to get busy,I weeded & split my lilies but thats it.
rox
I finally had to do the same, cut the hypocritical tie between me and my toxic sister. No more fake cards, calls, meetings of any kind. My soul just could not take it anymore. Pissed off a lot of people who thought I should've carried on with the life-long game. It felt soooo good to be honest.
On a nicer note, DD, can you tell me why tulips come up every single year, but never an actual flower, only the green leaves, very tall and good-looking, but no tulips? I can't figure it.
Pat,
Tia and the rest of the Ladies
are correct. Have no regrets.
Love that you were able to plant
a bit.
Don't regret it DD. It is so much nicer when people are in our lives because we want them there, not because we're guilted into having them there. Miss Tia's right, you don't owe her a thing. You are a dear, sweet person. Put it behind you & on to better things, like that lovely garden of yours. It's going to be stunning with all those flowers, the bright pop of the zinnias against the backdrop of the long swaying cleome. Four o'clocks are such a charming flower, What kind of marigolds? It sounds & looks like it would be a wonderful place to sit & paint on some lazy afternoons, do you paint, does Lissa paint?
Cards are tricky for me, too. I'll spend a lot of time trying to find one that doesn't say, your the greatest, I'm so lucky or I love you so much, when choosing cards for certain relatives of mine.
There really should be a line of smart-ass cards that say what you REALLY feel.
(Outside) "It's Your Birthday!"
(Inside) This special day just reminds me of how much I hate your friggin' ass! Eat shit and die!
Heh.
Good idea?
LMFAOOOOOOO!
Barbara, when do you mow them off? Because if they're mowed off before the leaf tips turn brown, they won't bloom the next year. I have some like that because some idiot (my mom) plants them all over the damn yard.
I am glad to hear that you didn't get her a card. She doesn't deserve it, and the older I get, the more I realize (and am comfortable with) telling it how it really is. No more fake cards or gestures. If I ignore you, it probably means you deserve it.
Last night, when I was having a paper-related meltdown at work, my boss had her visitor, who is the boss from another hospital, act as an inspector would, and quiz me about care plans. It hurt my feelings so bad. I thought, what kind of frickin' idiot are you???? I tried to convey it with my attitude and eyes, but the bitch remained thick as shit, so I answered her questions. I actually had to pause for several minutes to get myself under control first, which prompted my boss to tell me I could actually look at the care plan while I was talking about it. She totally misread me. My internal battle was whether I should throw the chart at her, or curse loudly.
Later, I told her that I had wanted to slap the snot out of the person asking about care plans. (no minced words for me, anymore.) My boss told me that she urged the other person to do it. Some people are just too stupid for words. I'm glad I spoke my mind, though.
I am loving it that you are gardening again. Beware the mother though. You know she will probably try to make you pay for ignoring her birthday.
my comments aren't showing. sorry if I ever offended anyone here. I go back and read some of my comments and they sound so stupid. so I will now just come by and read and send good vibes! bima
DD-love the garden pics!!! Love the words you wrote that go with this post more! I smiled about your frequent dreams of punching her in the face. I love ya :) I can not imagine living next door to her...really. You doing good sistah not to be where your dear bro is. Big Hug to you Pat. Your one of a kind and simply adorable!!!!
Oh, DD what kind of bulbs are in the red box???
Bima,
I have always enjoyed your comments! I hope you will post :)
Christina,
My BP was rising just reading about such a stupid dense shallow boss. I know I'd like you a lot in person, because you spoke your mind to her. Was she shocked to hear how pissed you were to be treated so shabbily? Brave and bold of you. You would be a pleasure to work with...I'm a RN too. Are you the chicken lady? If so, I'd like to hear more about your beautiful chickens when you get time.
Bima, I am not taking off your comments. Blogger is messed up and sometimes there's a wait before they show up..even mine.
I am glad you are working in the garden. Even if you are slower this time around, that is okay. It will still look beautiful!
Oldest and I went to the community garden yesterday and someone had extra plants up for grabs. We took the last two brussel sprout plants and promptly put them in one of our plots. We love them and to have our own supply is going to be great. I am going to take pics of the plots as they growing season progresses.
I am going through the same thing right now with fake cards and gifts. So glad to read others feel the same! I am done sending gifts/cards to people that suck,and are mean and rude, and I will not acknowledge gifts they send me. I know for a fact my monster in law ONLY sends a bday gift to me each year so she can elicit correspondance from me in the form of a thank you note.
I'm DONE.
And DD, trust me, you will not feel guilty when mumsy finally caks. You may regret not telling her off more; You will probably feel sorry for her; But there will be no guilt. Trust.
sooo...what about the boss and the x-mas gifts? This year, I totally took a apss. They cut our wages and I can't do it anymore. I am also not allowed anymore OT. So, she sees my check, she knows I can't buy her anything. So, I didn't. I told her when she handed me her obligatory Bath & Body Works gift bag, that I felt bad about it but said I hope she understands. And she was dismissive and nice & understood. Understood? She understood why I didnt give her an x-mas gift? Then that pissed me off. But I DIDN'T feel bad about it, I lied :( I didnt wanna get her anything. I dont want to this coming x-mas either. Anyone, else deal with this? I think at work it should be a no-no. But once you start it, ya know how it is.
R
NancyB---I think my boss was a little surprised that I spoke up. I usually just try to go with the flow rather than waste energy and time on small issues, but this was not small to me.
You're a nurse, too? What is your specialty? I'm sure I would enjoy working with you as well, because I always enjoy your comments, and the excerpts of information that you find.
Yes, I have chickens, and I love having them! The little ones are growing up, and some of them are really pretty. The big ones are laying anywhere from seven to nine eggs a day (out of nine birds mature enough to lay). I should get on the stick and send Pat some pictures of my girls and their eggs. They really are cute.
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