It's storming today, it looks like that picture I found. It's so dark it seems to be night, but, it's not. And the thunder is booming and rain is pelting the windows. I hope my tomatoes don't freeze, but, that's Iowa. Yesterday it became clear to me that my mother is losing it. Not that she ever really had it, but, now it's just bizarre. She had me take her to the court house (I have to go today!! TODAY!!) and I had no idea what she was up to, but, I took her. I went to the bathroom and when I came out she was telling this crazy story to the clerk and trying to buy insurance there. Car insurance. I was stunned. I didn't know she was that goofy. I took her by the arm and told her they don't sell insurance, it's the court house. She had all these deeds and titles in her purse she was waving around. I don't know what they're for. I got her out and headed for the car and she insisted she was going to the insurance company..she claims she's been paying on ME for a year now. Full coverage..she said that about five times. I have no idea what she's talking about and I felt sick and scared.*
When we started to cross the street, I said, do you want to go to the store or..where? She stopped in the middle of the street and held up traffic and said "I'm not going to hell. I live in hell. You were a horrible baby, that started my hell and now I take care of Ruth (her old sister) and that's hard! I live in hell! All she'll eat is toast! Toast, toast, all day long I make toast! It's hell!"
*
Weird enough, right? Then she goes, "horrible baby, horrible child, I hated you. Did you know that?" And I said, yes, now get in the car. She got in and smiled sweetly and said "I want to go to McDonalds. I like McDonalds."
*
So I took her to McDonalds. Jesus Christ on a crutch. She's lost her marbles..and no one knows it but me. She can still do all kinds of damage and people think she's sane. She's got people fooled. I spent the rest of the day throwing up and nursing a migraine wondering what she's going to do next. And she woke me up shining a flashlight directly in my window and I went out and asked her wtf she was doing and she said she was hunting slugs. "They come out when it rains, you know." And I said yes, that's why I put out slug poison, now go to bed." I feel like I'm living in an old Joan Crawford/Bette Davis movie.
40 comments:
I am so sorry, Pat. Any way you can get her in to see a doctor to get the diagnosis of dementia? Seriously. She is going to be a hazard to herself, and she already is a hazard to you. I don't care if she did find being a mother difficult, you never, ever say those things to your child.
If she has a family doctor, it may be possible to get her an appointment for physical symptoms, and have her mental status evaluated at the same time. That is what happened with my FIL. She may be recommended for assisted living if they have someone come see her house. I keep thinking about the relief it would be to you not to have her living next door.
i know walmart caught flack for taking out insurance policies on their door greeters w/o the employee's knowledge....i THOUGHT some law was changed so that people couldn't take out policies without the other person knowing because of that....of course i know it's iowa and that's just a separate entity when it comes to laws and common sense....
you should have left her at the court house window trying to buy insurance....more people would have seen that!!
gee, i called the humane society animal warden and i'm waiting for a call back....my insane neighbor has one of her dogs tied to the TOP OF THE FENCE with 2 feet of rope!! the dog cannot even sit down!!!!
She needs to see a good doctor before she makes a bad mistake that could hurt her or someone else.
Wow...maybe if you did leave her more ppl would see she's crazy. But that would be inhumane. I hope you have some relief soon, I really do.
"Yes, she's emotionally disturbed. She's unbalanced!"
OMG, Tia, that fucking neighbor!
Regarding the next door dog. You want to see a real screwed up mess?
http://www.torontosun.com/news/torontoandgta/2010/05/11/13911661.html#/news/torontoandgta/2010/05/11/pf-13911661.html
I like to think of myself as a pretty hard nut but this made me weep.
yeah it's been over an hour, no call back from the humane society....i don't want to make the picture public---she has been rather subdued lately---but it's on my facebook---took a pix of the dog on it's back legs and the fence that is falling apart....that fucking cunt.....
i'm gonna get dressed and find a neighbor to go knock on her door...if i went over there i'd get shot.....and i'm calling the humane society back telling them what i think of them.....
Just go take the dog. You'd be the best thing that ever happened to it.
I HATE people like that. I hate them so much.
HA. She's using your lines "I live in hell". Proof that she's been reading your blog.
You now have a witness to her crazy. Time to have her commited.
And it's snowing and freezing here.
i called the humane society AGAIN....i demanded to speak to a humane officer....they are sending someone out....
she is home, so this could be interesting.....she'll act all sweet and innocent and probably go on about her MS and lung cancer (she has that again)....and they can't afford to replace their fence---with the $300 TRAMPoline in the yard and the $250 gas grill just they bought.....and oh poor her....
fucking cunt...
DD & miss Tia I'm sorry you both live next to
such mean women.
Anon camper I saw that on the front page of
the sun & star (torontos main papers) it's so
despicable ! All because of ringworm ?! Kiki :(
OMG! You poor thing. I feel so sorry for you. It IS exactly like "What ever happened to baby Jane"! I think the stress is killing you. Thats what makes me sick. Throwing up etc. Its stress. Your headache is of great concern to me. Please call the neuro. He needs to know and may want to check you out. This is serious. Not a joke. Your mom is crazy and needs put in a home away from you so you can live your life in some normalcy. Toast? Is that true? They are both crazy. So sorry babe. We love you. Please take care of yourself & get better. xoxo
rox
Miss Tia, our local sheriff is a bit looney at times but he HATES animal abusers. One phone call to him and the poor dog would be fine dining while that beotch was chewing her cud in jail.
I don't understand people like that. Evidently she does not want the dog so why not give it to a good home? Hell, ANY home would be better that the one it has!
My FIL walks around with $7 or $8 thousand onnhim all the time. He wont use a bank! he's 83 and seems to be slipping away a little bit. So far the last 3 mos he has almost burned down his apt by letting a pan of oil catch fire while he forgot he had started it and then 2 weeks ago he calls us at 3:a.m. saying his apt is flooded and that somone came in at 2:00 a.m. & turned on his tub and let it overflow! Its been awful lately. he wants to see Tennessee once more, so my husband is taking him on a road trip next week. The floods recently have delayed the trip. I told him he wont make it out of Indiana before he turns around & heads home!!! He's crazy to go on a trip like that. Gawd, anything could happen! He tried to give my daughter $4G last Thanksgiving and she had to tell on him. It scares us. He always has tons of cash on him. He has 1 daughter that has made it perfectly clear that any money he has is hers and any insurance policy on him, is hers too. We can already see it now! We always say if someone wants something THAT bad, they can have it. Life is not fair and there's always at least 1 blood sucker in a family. Beware. & Take care.
rox
she thinks she is a good dog owner....she's that delusional....their rottweiller---that they stole little league money to buy---either starved to death or had heart worm or something----they did nothing to help him but she sure wailed the loudest when he died.....
she has 4 currently and she got a ticket for the dogs running loose a few months ago....she won't replace the fence--which is in pieces...rox saw the pix on my fb of how the fence is.....
it's horrible how she treats those dogs....
Yes I did see it. Its horrible!!! It made me want to cry. Poor dog is stranded for hours almost hung from a fence on his back legs and cannot relax at all or get down. He may even be choking. I hope he doesnt do harm to his skin by trying to escape. I wonder if he can even get a full breath. Its horrendous!! Piss me off. I would call the police but they suck. I hope someone gets her ass for this. Its cruelty.
Let us know how the dog fares or if he gets taken away.
xoxo
rox
humane society must have been out....dog has about 8 feet of rope now!
Wow, 8 whole feet. Poor dog sentanced to life in prison for being mans best friend. We have people like that around here too and I hate them with a passion. I hope they all get attacked by rabid coons.
what makes it WORSE is that when the dogs were puppies they kept them in the house and loved them up constantly....they get about 6 months and out in the yard they go!!
they use to let them run in the backyard but they kept getting out and she got a ticket for dogs at large and she will NOT replace the fence that is really in PIECES......but she'll buy a $300 TRAMPoline and a $250 gas grill....fucking cunt....
i thought the humane society HAD been out since the dog got 8 feet of rope....no, they are there NOW almost 2 hours after i finally spoke to a humane officer (and i spoke him 2 hours after first calling to report this without a call back)....and of course this is after they gave the dog more rope! FUCK YOU HUMANE SOCIETY OF GREATER AKRON!!!!!
Jesus Christ on a crutch is right. Fuck.. what can a person even say about that?
It pisses me off. I do the same thing here Tia, I call and call..and get nothing.
Tia, so now it looks like an errant call? I think whoever gets on that trampoline will probably bounce off and hit their head on a tree root thats probably sticking way up out of the dirt, right? We love our babies and were sad y'day that Hucky Finn got his 1st haircut and his momma forgot to ask the groomer to save his baby hair! LOL!!! He even got a mohawk! A jet black scotty pup with a cool mohawk! He's a rock star!! Love the dogs you have. help the ones you can and be good to animals in general and you will live a good life with a clean conscience. Miss Tia, thank you for the pup. I'm sure he appreciated it. Does he have access to water now? He has got to be dying of thirst. Poor baby.
xo
rox
"Whatever happened to Baby Jane?", right, DD? That is how I sort of picture your mom.
Sounds like she is slipping into alzheimers or what I've seen of it in several poor souls that I've known. I feel for you because they say it is a nightmare for the relatives of those people who have it.
I'd take that dog and head right down to the police station after I'd taken a picture of how that horrible beast of a neighbor treated him. If they couldn't get someone from the humane society to give you some attention, I'd call a rescue (non-kill, of course) org in the area and keep that poor thing in my house until they came over and saw the picture and heard the story. If you can't keep the dog yourself, you'll at least know he is going to a place where they love dogs and will take care of him.
Rotten old witch!!!! I wish someone would tie her to a fence.
FUCKTIA-you deserve your neighbor.
DD is going to have a stroke or aneurysm. I had a vision.
I need to cry/whine/bitch to somebody..besides my family..LOL
I went to the dentist today. I had not been in a few years. I have been having bleeding and pain ever since i quit smoking.
Long story short..I have fucking gum disease and moderate bone loss in some of my back teeth.
I have to have all my teeth scaled. Let me tell you what that is..Nazi torture. That is what that is. I had the left top done. Next week left bottom.
They freaking scrape your teeth (front and back) all the way up underneath your gums).
FUCK!
I am a bit cranky but nothing a bowl of pho (oldest is making) and a doobie wont cure.
rant over...
sorry Pat about your mom. You need some pure peace in your life.
anon 7:42, you live in PA right matt heckass? come on over to akron ohio and pay me a visit in person...we'll have a nice chat....
oh that's right, you're a total fucking pussy TROLL who is sick and twisted and has several screws loose....
Pat ~
You've had yourself one hell of a day - storms and your crazy mother.
Don't know if you even want any advice, but from having gone through something similar with my father, Christina post is right.
Your mother must have a local doctor, and they're usually very helpful in these situations if they know that the representing family member is being proactive about the situation.
Dementia affects the elderly in a myriad of ways. It's common, tho, that the disease unhinges that impulse control of speech - and they spew out crap like your mother did. It's like shooting diarrhea - uncontrollable with excessive emotion.
Also not being able to remember that you can't buy insurance at town hall is a clear sign, along with quick mood swings.
If you talk to her doctor, he'll do tests. If she's on medications, Medicare will cover visiting nurse care. They'll see the conditions that she's living in, note and track it and it's reported back to the doctor and the town social agencies. She'll be declared incompetent and will be made a ward of the state, and be removed to live in a safer environment. (And you are only the informant - you NEVER offer to "fix" any of the situation.)
It can be done if you want to deal with it.
If that was me with my head in a bucket, puking from fear and dealing with blinding migraines brought on by stress, well, I get the first seat on the life raft.
You've got this bizarre, toxic dance going with her - and she's leading. We, who post here and enjoy reading your blogs know that you're able to vent through your writings.
But we also are able to have an objective take on your mess of a situation and we see your health and your soul shriveling, day by day.
We really do want to see you come out of this, calm and whole.
Miss Tia-your story about the neighbor's dog makes me cry. Fuck that evil, rotten bitch. I hope she burns in hell. I do believe that if there's a hell, animal abusers go there.
DD-are you sure nobody else realizes your mother is crazy? It sounds like it's gotten so bad she would have a really, really hard time hiding it. Maybe they realize she's crazy but just don't want to bother to get involved, so they pretend she's normal. That's the only reason I can think of that they don't come out and say she is BATSHIT! Because she obviously is.
I love stormy weather. I like to sit on the carport, watch it rain, and read. I'm not afraid of the lightning. If it's going to strike, it will. My sister has a friend who was sitting in a recliner by a fireplace and she got struck. To me, that was very strange. Anyone else with strange weather occurences?
for 2 years I helped take care of my ex MIL who had dementia, then an Alzheimers diagnosis. Unedited stream of conciousness speech is one symptom.... and it was always hateful...as she worsened she would physically attack family members, intending to harm them. These symptoms are common in people with dementia/Alzheimers.
What the hell with that souless dog owner? Animal abusers are scum and shoud do jail time for their crimes.
We would give one of my friends a ride to the store, and as we waited in the car,she would keep arguing and trying to get out of the car, insisting she worked there. Very confused all the time, about just about everything.
Alzheimer's is fatal in and of itself. It is a terminal illness, with no hope of remission or cure.
She needs to get medical help, as others have said. There are medications that can slow the mental decline, and can calm her down. She also needs to get the Medicare help she is entitled to, nursing and home health visits.
The family took care of the MIL to avoid losing her home after her death to Medicare to pay nursing home costs.It was hell and involved many people taking turns.They finaly lose control of bathroom functions and must be diapered and frequently changed.
Yes, Medicare will impound and sell property owned by the Alzheimer's victim to recoup nursing home costs. In many cases this multiplies the loss for the family.
I care about you. Please let us know what is happening. I fervently wish you health, happiness, and a much less stressful life.
Pat, I'm sorry you have to go through this. But it might bring the proof you need to get some help with her. If her actions become evident to others, the decision may be made for you by her dr. If you bring her to the dr., make him/her aware of these happenings. Does Ruth live with her? I just thought they were always together. If she does live with her, make her dr. aware of this and voice your concern. After that, tell him you feel that given the situation, you would like his help in any future decisions that need to be made for their welfare. This really could be a life or death situation.
Would Joey be of any help in proving her mental stability? Maybe Casey and your Lissa's mom could be character witnesses when the time comes. Do you have a fire dept. that would be willing to make a visit to the house to check out fire hazards.
I know you need time to heel and the peace that is needed for that, but I think you are looking at her very near future.
One more thing, I so happy Michael was not mean and saying ugly things. His decline at the end was so rapid, he must have skipped that part. But I laso know that this can be a very long drawn out problem and I really don't think you can take much more of this!!!
And I know it's a situation that only you are completely aware of, but maybe we see something that you are too close to see---we see the urgency!!!! Please don't let your health become worse. Talk to Casey when she comes home. Maybe her opinion will help.
Hey pat
I just found out that at 9pm est on PBS there is a documentary on The Doors and it is narrated by Mr. Depp.
Lots of never before seen photos and footage.
I hope you are having a nice quiet evening.
I know many, many people have asked you this question in the past: is there no way you can move somewhere else? Could you move closer to Casey J.?
Your mother is making you so ill - and you know it will get worse before it gets any better.
We all have our limitations as to what we can do (financially/emotionally/etc) so I do understand if that is not an option. But I also know that your mother has held you back in the past (to put it mildly), sold your house, forced you to live where you did not want to and is dictating your days, to some extent.
Your health is an issue - you could also benefit from living in a city that offers more than what you have right now.
I am in no position to move anywhere right now, if I wanted that option. So I do understand. But if there is just a chance that you could afford a move, I think we would all agree that that could solve so many physical and emotional stresses you are facing right now.
We all care about you, Pat.
Bayou Jane-if you want strange lighting stories, you should try to find a copy of an episode of "Unsolved Mysteries" about this family of people were kept getting struck by lightning. I think it started way back in the 1800s. Throughout the generations many people in the family kept getting struck by lightning. It was really weird. You could look for it on YouTube, I don't know if it will be there (my computer sucks and can't support YouTube so I don't know).
7:42:00 PM, that's not a vision. It's called reading my blog, you fucking brain dead moron.
Pat,
my mom used to tell me too, how much she hated us kids, what a mistake it was to get married and have kids, and how I would suffer once I got married and had kids just like she did. God she was an awful person.
She died last August. I don't talk to my siblings, and none of us had children. nice legacy, huh?
Keep truckin lady, you got the good stuff.
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