The latest addition is a little girl Lis met at the pool a couple of days ago. I'll call her, Lizzy. Since their names are similar. So, the first day, Lissa gave Lizzy our number and she passed it to her 'mother' who called me out of the blue and left a message asking me to give her daughter a ride home from the pool when I picked up Alissa. Umm, okay, fine. Weird though, I mean, I've never even met these people. Neither has Lissa. So, the kid's mom lets her ride with strangers??
When I picked the kid up, she said she didn't know where she lived, even though she's the same age as Alissa. Excuse me, what? I took her home to our house and fed them while I tried to figure it out. She likes Lasagne. Sigh. Bless her heart. Turned out the confusion was directional, as in, she didn't know how to get there from here. Alright, but, she should have known how to get there from the pool, right? Kids are a pain in the ass, so I let it slide. She obviously wanted to go home with Lis, but, damn, she'd be in a world of trouble when she got home, right? Can you imagine?
I hate driving in the dark, but, we set off to find her home after I said, just give me a street, a hint! I found it. It turned out, it's only six blocks from our house, but, across the main drag, so it's a better neighborhood and a cute house. Only, it was dark. No one was home. I took Lizzy back to our house and tried two more times until finally, I saw a light on around 10 pm. I watched until she got in and went home relieved, but, kind of stressed. I decided not to judge, the mom is a working mom. Things can get hairy sometimes. It all worked out.
Yesterday, the same damn thing happened. Only this time NO ONE ever showed up at her home. Lizzy told me no one had been home since I dropped her off the day before! She claimed she'd been alone all that time! (Then who turned on the light I saw?) I left a note on the door with my name and address, saying she was fine and welcome. But, Lizzy is still here this morning! The two girls are sleeping as I type this. I am just blown away. Last night, Lizzy told me her real parents are dead and she had a great foster mom who also died and now she is living with her new foster mom and her 'uncle' who is not really her uncle and not the foster mom's husband. But, this kid has told me so many lies already, I have no idea what to believe. The thing is, she may be a teller of tales, but, she's also a very nice, polite little thing and I really don't mind having her around. We do have to get some rules straight. She does not like rules or orders, apparently. She does what she wants. Lis tries to pull that too, but, she doesn't get away with it here. Neither will Lizzy once I figure her out. Right now, I feel like I have to cut her some slack.
I really don't know what to think at this point. I have to work today, so she HAS to go home for awhile. All I really know is, there are several people who read here who desperately want children. Does this story sort of, in some little way, make you, maybe, think about taking an older child who needs you? This little girl is adorable and she'd clearly rather stay here where she feels safe. It was just a thought. She's sure not the only kid who needs someone. She's not even the only kid in our neighborhood. It breaks your heart.
I really need a break at this point. It's been a horrendous week, the kids are the least of it. My blood pressure is spiking and I need a couple of days to regenerate. Just a couple of peaceful days alone, please, and I'll be ready again. But, there is no way I am leaving this small girl alone in an empty house tonight. Or any night. This situation is just strange.
Oh, get this, it will crack you up...Lizzie claims her real last name is 'AmericanDoll'. Yeah, okay then. I'll just look in the phone book under A...or BS.
13 comments:
My gawd. The old ladies. All the drama with this child. And the animals. Man, you do lead an exciting life in such a small town! My SIL that passed away never met a stranger either. If a kid, a Nephew, a cousin needed a place to live. No questions asked. A bed, food, even a car was there for them. And she would always pay when they would go out to eat. Included them in everything and never interfered in their problems. But was there if they needed her. Sometimes a young man just needs a place to hide out for a while. Since she only had boys, they only brought home guys to stay. Or they just showed up one day and stayed. Lol. She was the best, most thoughtful aunt my kids had. We miss her. Her heart was as big as a house! You are doing a good thing. It reminded me of her, so much.
Awww. Well, they have to eat my cooking. I can't take them out, I'm broke unless I get some clients today (please, please). Boxed mac and cheese with peas tonight with generic ice cream for after. Anyone who bitches has to sleep in the car with the cats.
I am a Christian, and I know you emphatically do not believe, but you are doing what I would call God's work. Bless you for being there for that child and all the others you have not mentioned. That is a huge thing in my eyes.
Christina
Christina, you're my kind of christian. You don't preach, that's why we get along. I'm an old solitary grouch, but, I relate to kids. They drive me to insanity, but, we've all been there, right? I had a bad upbringing, I can't leave one hungry, scared or alone. Can't do it. Besides, it's bad karma. Not sure if that's real either, but, it seems to be.
Also, this was a good lesson for Lissa. I asked her if she'd rather live on the pretty boulovard, in a nice house, while all alone at night, or in our dumpy, cluttered cabin in Guntown where people love her? She didn't have to think twice.
I would say that you are putting the "human" in humanity! Not enough of that.
I don't feel like I've done anything the rest of you wouldn't.
Yeah, you've done one thing I wouldn't - you haven't gone to the door of the girl's house, knocked until an adult showed his or her face, and demanded to know what the hell is going on. You could be anyone. You could run a house full of child molesters, and they seem fine fobbing her off on you, anyway. She could be a fucked up foster kid, or she could be an unhinged, congenital liar, but that is beside the point that there seems to be no responsible adult. If this is the best that they can do, they don't need to be foster parents. If it is her real mom, that’s even worse. You were not put on this earth to enable every lazy, irresponsible asshole who finds his way to your door, and you are going to let yourself get used right back into the hospital. Sorry, rant over. Just that I like you and all.
N.
Weird!
N, you are right, of course. The kid does have other problems, besides lying, I can see that. But, I'm not narcing off a 9 yr old in a blog. She has enough problems. The immediate one is lack of supervision. These people are new in town, I have no idea who they are or how they'd react to being called out. If it got bad in a confrontation, the kid might lose the only place she has to go right now. I don't want that. I'd rather be patient and see what's really going on.
Lia, very weird!
N, ps..the kid seems more interested in hanging out with ME than playing with Lissa. What do you make of that? I'm puzzled and don't want to hang out with some kid all the time, unless it's Lis. But, I made some time for her before shooing her off, as in, "Well, my goodness, that was quite a story. Here's a sucker, go play with Lissa now."
She also asked if I was mad at her for lying. I told her I was more disappointed. And, if we become real friends, you wouldn't lie to me anymore, right? I said, besides, with your imagination, you might become a famous writer or movie producer. She seemed amazed that someone thought she could be anything. How can you look away from a kid like that?
You're there and I'm not; it's just my opinion. Of course, you must do as you will. I just wish that you were half as generous with yourself as you are with everyone else. It's this kid now on top of Aunt Bitch Face, with grown men who are related to her living in the house sitting on their asses, while you court another stroke trying to sort out her meds. Unacceptable.
The fact that you took Lizzie back home and no one even came to the door is very telling. No interest in even laying eyes on the person in whose home the child entrusted to their care spent the night. I get what you mean about being patient, and being that port in the storm, but there will always be those kids. You have to strike a balance. The fact that Lis’s mother and your mother are so arrogant in their dealings with you makes me think that they have grown very comfortable treating you as a doormat. You got out of the hospital, what, two fucking months ago. Bloody hell. When is it your turn to be overwhelmed and crazy and get a pass on life? I wish you’d tell Lissa’s mom that you are going to take some time for you, she is going to have to work out her “schedule” differently, and if she doesn’t like it, tough shit. Why are your needs less important than everyone else's?
Regarding Lizzie wanting to spend more time with you than with Lissa, I think kids who have dodgy home lives are survivors, and have a survivor’s sense for an adult they can trust. That’s why it’s such a crime when psychos set them up to betray them. But the incessant lying is never a good sign. You have a way of striking the right chord when talking to kids with problems, and you’ll probably get to the bottom of it, but you need boundaries and you need to learn to say NO. Being everything to everybody all the time is a one-way ticket to collapse – and then they’ll all have to sort themselves out, anyway.
N.
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