Jen hated John Mayer twittering all the time. He couldn't call her or send an email, saying he was too busy, but, then she checked his stoopid twitter page and found twits every few minutes. Jen was fuming. She called him and told him it was over and he said okay. "He took it like a man" says the Telegraph.
Then he twittered "This heart didn't come with instructions.'' I'll bet his penis did though. That probably came with a book. Hell, his penis probably writes books. I know it twitters.
14 comments:
Twitter is for people who are in love with themselves. Aniston finally got the hint.
does that mean she's gettimg a twit account?
Twitter?? Dear Jen, You're 40 Bitch!! Grow up!
Dear Jen,
Stop panting after men who are confirmed assholes.
Regards
He didn't take it like a man, he gave it like a man...passive aggressively and with carefully placed crosses, like land mines, for her to martyr herself for love.
My thoughts go to David Arquette, poor bastard. I am sure Cheryl Crow and Jen will be over to whine over their wine.
Sprite
PS--I
f I was able to earn what Jen earns, I would enjoy myself. Who needs a man? I can be completely happy with a rescued pet, your friends and my folks...oh, right, she's estranged from her mom. Poor Jen. It's not her.
Just give me books, a hammock in an exotic locale and sunblock. I want to go to Petite St. Vincent Resort when I win the lottery. Crabbie and DD, you're invited to my party and any readers I can profile in advance. We can all have our own cottages and email each other. Maybe we could rally around the bar a time or too, we don't want to smother each other.
anon 8:35
I think you may be right about John's intentions all along. I am a man who admittedly behaved in a similar manner towards ladies that did not deserve the maltreatment I gave them. I can picture John showing texts to his friends and bragging about "Brad's ex" chasing my cock!.
I think she tickled his vanity and gave him a new forum to pose and mingle for a new set of papparazzi.
I have no doubt she will stumble on a man that will appreciate her affection and maybe even enjoy cuddling (yikes!). Until then, ply hard to get Jen; it works.
Lothario
Ahhhhh interesting. If I had known then what I know now..but, like Sprite, I no longer care.
lol...his penis probably writes books, thanks, that was hilarious!!
I've come to the conclusion that its not John Mayer with the issues, its Jennifer. Look at all of the relationships this girls been in and failed at? I bet she is so annoying to actually be around.
FoXfiRe
she's too boring for someone like mayer or pitt for that matter. she should go for much older men. she's a really 'old' person. some people are old when they are born and others (probably like mayer) never grow up.
I have a feeling she is an old soul, as someone here said. Trying to date the peter-pan type guys to satisfy your ego, Jen, just won't work out well for you. Try to find another old soul who will love you for yourself. That's my advice. I dated a soap opera actor once who, while we were the same age, was about 19 in his own mind. Used to take me places, theaters and restaurants and such, and position us so that he was always looking in a mirror. Can you imagine how long that lasted?
I dated a guy like that too. He was the son of very famous celeb. So worthless. Called himself So-and-so junior. That wasn't even his name, it was his dads. Fucking idiot. 2 dinners and I was done.
And yes..on the last one I ordered the lobster. You girls know what that means.
oh hell, screw the posts, tell us more, DD!!!
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