Today the net cable was out, but, the TV still worked, so, I layed in bed and watched Sex In The City. It was the episode where Carrie first started seeing Mr. Big regularly and she was laying in bed with him, sucking it in and trying to get the best light on her face and look beautiful (and don't lie, you've all done it) and she was looking at him so lovingly...when it happened. She squeaked out a fart. I thought I would die laughing. I laughed so hard, the dog thought I was a mental patient. Have you ever had that happen? What's the most embarrassing sex thing that's ever happened to you?
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
I thought I had seen them all
Today the net cable was out, but, the TV still worked, so, I layed in bed and watched Sex In The City. It was the episode where Carrie first started seeing Mr. Big regularly and she was laying in bed with him, sucking it in and trying to get the best light on her face and look beautiful (and don't lie, you've all done it) and she was looking at him so lovingly...when it happened. She squeaked out a fart. I thought I would die laughing. I laughed so hard, the dog thought I was a mental patient. Have you ever had that happen? What's the most embarrassing sex thing that's ever happened to you?
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I remember flying out of bed before he woke up so that I could shower and put on makeup.
I don't remember the first fart, though. And I don't remember what happened to make him think that he can do it right next to me in the bank, 18 years later??
I don't want to get too specific, but let's just say, I'll never be able to look a goat in the eye again.
Well it took the father of my children and I almost 5 years to even be comfortable to even pass gas around each other.
We still laugh about it to this day.
Maybe we should all fart on the first hook up? I'm with Samantha, who said "unaceptable".
I LOVE SATC!!! I have been enjoying the old re-runs on E! lately.
Awkward sex moments? When I walked in on my parents when I was 8. My dad was naked sitting on the floor beside the bed, smoking a cig, and my mom was up in the bed-flat out!. I figured out that he jumped on the floor when he heard me come in. gawd almighty. AWKWARD!! None of us ever metioned it either. More awkward!
I keep getting deleted on here today. So, this may not post.
rox
Even worse: a friend of mine walked into the kitchen and caught her mom giving her father a BEEJ!!! In the damn kitchen! Thats worse. She wins.
rox
I HAVE seen this one before and when it ran on E! the other day, I laughed as hard as I did the first time! Even more so, because this very thing happened to someone I know and she reacted the same way as Carrie...LOL
Mine is walking in on my GRANDPARENTS when I was about 5 yrs old. My grandma had been sleeping with me and I woke up, she was gone, so I went looking. I found her and boy, did grandpa yell, although I had no idea why. Fast forward about 20 yrs, I'm sitting at the kitchen table with my aunts and grandmother and while reminiscing about other things, I start telling this story, thinking it was something it really wasn't....As my aunts are looking at me with this horrified look on their faces, all the sudden it hits me, what I actually had seen. It was like post-traumatic stress syndrome X 300...Poor grandma, she just sat there, I'm not sure she really understood at that point what was really being said and thank GOD for that...LOL
In certain positions, one or the other of my hips cramps most uncomfortably at the most inopportune moment. From what I can remember. It's been a while.
This happens to my sisters as well.
I have no "walking in on my parents" stories because I'm fairly certain they had sex a total of six times in their whole marriage. Me + four sibs and one still born son. Six.
we were on a ski lift ride, in the summer, going up the mountain,with our two little boys. We were reading the numbers on the lifts coming down. We then noticed a woman on her knees, and her friend looking very relaxed, in a car coming down...
We had to rush to turn the kids away. The couple in the car never stopped what they were doing.
Ultimate shame=queefing after hot sex in an armchair.
It sounded like a duck with palsy was making an escape from inside my vagina.
LMAO at the memory, every time I moved, the vagde quacked and we both laughed...and if you've ever queefed, you know laughter sets of a string of queefs!
Ah. Memories.
From too shy to reveal my name
Musta been that beast sex. Yep. Queef city.
HAHAHAHA!! I was lied to before I moved in with my husband. I asked him if he had a farting problem and he said no. He has some stinky ones that can clear a room. So when I tell him that he lied to me, he says he told the truth. He doesn't have a farting problem: he farts, no problem!
I wish mine stunk like his so he knows what it's like to be on the receiving end. But I beat him with my awesome tonal quality. They're worth recording.
One time I thought it would be romantic if N and I took a shower together. N told me it would be horrible and is one of those things that's nice in theory but horrible in practice, but somehow I convinced him to try it with me anyway. It was going okay until a bottle of face wash fell on my toe...I thought it was hurting an awful lot so I looked down and blood was gushing out everywhere so then I started to black out and had to jump out of the shower. Yeah, totally not sexy in practice, but it was funny and those funny moments can really turn out sweeter than something involving whipped cream and lingerie, if you know what I mean!
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