DEAR ABBY: My fiance's ex-girlfriend "Amanda" has been living with his parents for more than three years. I feel cheated out of the opportunity to have a daughter-like relationship with my fiance's parents. I want her to move out.
I have discussed this with my fiance, and he talked to his mother and told her that we're getting married and it's time for Amanda to leave. Amanda also agrees it's time for her to move, but my future mother-in-law doesn't. I don't think she wants to let go of Amanda and her grandson. It's like Amanda is her daughter.
I don't like the situation. It's not normal, and I don't know what to do. Should I confront his mother or just stay quiet? I want to feel like I'm the daughter-in-law, not Amanda! Please help. -- CHEATED IN HOLLAND, MICH.
DEAR CHEATED: I see nothing positive to be gained from a confrontation. Once you and your fiance are married, you will be the only daughter-in-law.
However, you will have to accept that Amanda's child will always be your in-laws' first grandchild. Regardless of how far or how fast Amanda moves out, her child will have a place in their hearts and their lives. Having had their grandchild living in their home for this period of time has intensified the bond. Please consider carefully how this will affect you before you marry this man, because feeling as you do, it may be a difficult adjustment.
****
Oh, I totally disagree with Abby. Dear Cheated, you have the right to dictate who your mother in law has living in her own house. How dare she think she can decide on her own! Demand that she throw Amanda and her little bastard out on the street and have nothing more to do with them. Soon, you will be calling her 'mommy' and having tea and lovely chats together. She'll forget all about that little bastard, who isn't her for real grand kid anyhow. YOUR kids will be her for real grand kids and everyone will get over it. For the first couple of years, you might be gracious enough to let mom in law send a Christmas card to the little bastard. This is just being polite, which I can tell you are. After that, have her ease off all contact and soon it will all be a distant memory. Does your mom in law like puppies? You might consider giving her a puppy gift. This will not only endear you to your new mommy, but, will make her forget the little bastard even faster. Replace all the bastards photos in her home with new puppy photos! Be sure and pick nice frames that go with her decor.
Good luck to you, you sound like a wonderful daughter.
11 comments:
My thoughts exactly. Who is this bitch to tell them who can live in their house? If my son had a child with a girl who had nowhere to go I could picture me letting her move in. No wonder they hold out hope for their son getting back with this girl. The new one sounds like a raging bitch.
She's a real peach, you can tell. I wish someone I know would have tipped her hand this well before she married into my family.
BTW, this sentance killed me.."I feel cheated out of the opportunity to have a daughter-like relationship with my fiance's parents."
Who the fuck would want that?? Gowd, I hate my own parents. I don't want more of the sonsabitches.
This bitch is going to make everyone's lives miserable for the year and a half it takes to plan her Bridezilla wedding. "It's all about meeeeeeee."
Fuck, I like the original girl better too.
The fiance in this story is a pussy. Instead of agreeing with the bridezilla wanna be he should have told her to butt out. It's his son for crips sake. Why pull him from a probably stable home to something he'll need to adjust to?
My guess is that he's not paying a dime in child support either...as long as his mommy is providing food and shelter for his kid.
Pussy.
Yeah, he's a jewel too. He agrees with Bridezilla. WTF business is it of his what his mom does?
The child should have been mentioned in her first paragraph.
That omission and the subsequent tiny toss-off detail of the grandson ... like, "Oh yeah, there's a kid [sniff], too" ... AFTER her immature jealousy hissy about the former girlfriend? Bridezilla + Sperm Donor = Losers. And I don't think that math is gonna change no matter who moves where.
Poor kid.
At least he has grandma.
Excellent point, Cats Paw. I had to read it twice before I realized that there was a child living there. What a harpy this bitch is.
Daughters-in-law may come and go, but grandchildren are foreveer. Or should be. There are many cases where some grandparents never see their grandparents because the families split and mom moves and takes the kids far, far away. It's sad!
The problem here is the male and his parents. He produced a child and dumped his ex gf and HIS CHILD on his parents. His fiance needs to see the future and leave this looser male.
Hopefully he will wake up, and with the encouragement of his parents, especially his mother should cut the apron string as she and her husband had their own lives. And take back his ex gf and HIS OWN CHILD and make a life with them outside of his parents home.
Anyone wonder why the ex is waiting around for three years?
Post a Comment